Yesterday I arose at three in the morning to make it to a 4:30am. crew call to check-in a hundred extras. For those who work in film, you know this is not unusual. Heinous and insane, yes; but not unusual. Halfway through the check-in process, it hit. Nausea, dizziness, and I started to lose my voice. I thought it was just the feeling of being overwhelmed having to directly interact with so many people at once. That does get a little overwhelming for me. Either that, or the fact that the head of our H.R. department was sitting right next to me, listening to every stray word that flew from my mouth in my usual attitude of easy morning banter.
Hey! These people got up almost as early as I did and most of them still look a little bleary-eyed. I see it as my duty to welcome them warmly and help them smile as they hand over their truckload of new-hire paperwork and documentation. Some of them have never done this before and they look a little scared. I THANKED every single person who came to my table and made some honest-to-goodness compliment to them before we got into the sticky bid’ness of form-filling. I am hoping that Mr. Head of HR has a sense of humor, because I could get so nailed if he took some of my witty repartee at face-value.
“Dude! Do you ride a Harley?”
“Oh, you should, man! I can totally see you with the Hell’s Angels cruising down the freeway! That beard is smokin’ hawt! Thanks for coming today!”
I look at his docs. “All the way from Arizona? Seriously?”
“Yeah. Just got in last night.”
“Oh, man! You SO need a Harley!”
And so it goes. Oh well, it was a great job while it lasted. Honestly, I… I don’t know what more to say about it except, “Pray for me, please?”
So I made it through. We processed those hundred background actors in record-time; and I—thankfully—was able to head back to the office. That’s all it took. By the time I had made the 45 minute drive to get there, my throat was on FIRE and I kind of wanted to just die. Yuck.
Fortunately however, my immune system seems to be working up-to-par because this horrible nastiness has worked its way through my system fairly quickly! I’m 36 hours in now. The blazing inferno of hellfire and damnation which was my larynx subsided early on, and I’ve developed the Kathleen Turner wanna-be voice.
(…Which obviously you aren’t hearing because by the time I got around to recording this, I had already moved past this stage am well on my way to complete recovery. Drat!) Because, really… It was the entire reason for this post in the first place. I didn’t want to let the opportunity slip by without recording something with that husky mama. I can still try it, but it just won’t be the same. Just close your eyes, use your imagination, and picture the lovely Ms. Turner, or Lauren Bacall, if you are so inclined. “I’m not bad. I’m just drawn that way.” Right. Anyone who knows me personally is right now laughing their head off ‘cause I am SO not this person. “I just play one on my audioblog.”
As I began to say, I have been very blessed with keeping fairly free of viral outbreaks as everyone else around me suffers frequently through the “cold and flu season”. Perhaps it’s because I don’t believe there is such a thing as a “cold and flu season”. I actually believe this is something that drug corporations have created through their marketing campaigns in order to sell more product. And, like a self-fulfilling prophecy, it works really well for them… at the consumers’ expense. I never get a flu-shot either: because guess what it has in it! The flu! Duh.
In the same vein, I also don’t like to take cold-meds unless it becomes absolutely necessary in order to function in society; and then, only in rarefied cases. I’m of the opinion that “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Copious amounts of water, vegetables, and exercise are my superhero friends. Oh, and SUN: my dear friend, the sun, when he and I can arrange our schedules to coincide. Which isn’t very often.
Perhaps, if Mr. HR decides he doesn’t have a sense o’ humor, I should move to Hawaii where Mr. Sun and I might get better acquainted.